Blade Kissed
by amyisabear
Summary: A Danisnotonfire/Dan Howell imagine-thingy but comment if you want me to continue. Also available on wattpad. (@amyisabear)
1. Chapter 1

He brushed his thumb over the deepest cut and searched my eyes like there were to be an answer deep inside them. Tears layered over his eyes, threatening to fall. His cheeks burned bright red and his lower lip quivered. He closed his eyes, allowing long deserved tears to escape his beautiful coffee orbs; and whispered a most dreadful question. "Why?"

I blinked and took a shaky breath. I let go of the empty pill case and took his hand, allowing more tears to cascade and layer over dried ones.

"Because," I began. "Because they hate me."

"This much?" He whined, breathing over each gash, my wrist still gripped in his hand. "Fuck, Tammy, I'm your best friend. You know you can tell me anything."

"Why do you even care about what I say? You treat me so sweetly and I'm not complaining but it's my turn yo ask the question... Why?" I questioned truthfully.

"Because," he mocked. "Because I love you."

A fresh batch of fast tears spill from my eyes as I force my aching arms over his shoulders and engulf him in a satisfying embrace. He kissed back gently, putting me on his lap, off of the cold bathroom tiles. Losing breath easily, I pulled back and gazed into his beautiful brown eyes. He grins as more tears slide down his face.

"I love you so, _so_ much!" he whimpered hopelessly.

"What could you ever love about me?" I grumbled.

"Well," he grinned, sniffling. He took my face in his gentle hands and brought it to his lips delicately. "I love your forehead." I giggle. "I love your cheekbones," he mumbles between kissing them both. "I love your eyes." I closed my eyes and smiled greatfully as he planted gentle kisses over each lid. "I love your nose." He pecked the tip of my nose like a four year old. "I love your glabella," he giggled, kissing just above my nose. He slipped my long-sleeve over my head, revealing an expected black tank-top. "I love your hands." He took them in his own, kissing the back of them delicately, moving up my arms. "I love your wrists," he murmurs between embracing each blade-kissed slit. "I love your shoulders," he kissed each shiny peak. "I love your collarbones," he said simply, kissing them in a lustful manner. "I love your ears." He kissed each lobe. He turned my neck the slightest, still smiling. "Oh, god, I love your neck," he mumbles desperately, kissing just behind my ear. I shivered. He pulled my waist towards his, tipping my head further back.

"Dan," I chuckle, almost moaning."

"Yes, dear?"

"That... it f-ffeels so-o... good..." I stuttered breathlessly.

He chuckled against my skin, making me shudder, my head still in his hands. "I'm not done." he mumbles pulling away an grazing his lips over mine. "I love your smile." He kissed my lips. "I love your laugh." He kissed me again. "I love your voice." Continuing his pattern. "I love your lips- I love you- I love you- You're alive and I love it- I love you," he continued.

"I love you, too." I sobbed into his shoulder as he kissed my neck again. Black spots began to cloud over my peripheral vision and I cried harder. "I don't wanna go."

He hugged me tighter, letting go of my neck, and began to cry again, too. "Don't leave me," he murmurs.

"I really don't want to," I whispered. I locked my hands behind his neck and kissed him again.

"I- love y-you... s-sso... much-ch," he murmured between kisses, hiccuping on his tears.

"I'm scared, Dan." I sobbed, pulling away softly. My vision, once again, began to cloud with spots. I fought for every last moment I could get my hands on to be with Dan. My breaths grew shorter and more shaky and my heart raced. I was breaking into a miserable sweat and I was desperate to be loved. "I wanna stay," I whispered, growing limp. He holds my body against his as I had rested my chin on his shoulder like burping a baby. "Call," I pointed with a limp finger to the phone on the floor next to us.

I heard a distant phone call, instructing Dan to keep me awake for as long as possible, also guaranteeing an ambulance and a police unit. Reality began to fade as I sat still resting over Dan's shoulder. He noticed as he hung up and let go of me slightly to look me in the eyes. My eyelids grew heavy as I fought to keep them open, blinking heavily occasionally.

"I love you so much, Dan." I whispered, groggily out of drowsiness and tears.

"Tell me what you love about me," he urged nearly franticly, giving me a begging smile.

"I love your hair," I ran a hand through his fringe. "I love your eyes," I held my hand to the side of his head, rubbing my thumb over his eyelid like a windshield wiper. "I love your pink lips," I dragged a finger across his shape-inherited lips. "I love everything." I heard sirens getting closer to the complex and reality forced a dark fade over my eyes. "I just wanna rest."

"Don't go."

"I'm trying as hard as I can not to."

"Promise."

"I promise."

The front door bursted open and I heard aggressive footsteps approach the room. "STATUS?!" a deep bellowing voice requests.

"Uh-uhmm." Dan stammered, shocked a bit."Overdose, painkillers, deep cuts, her eyes are closed but she's awake.

"Can you give us a sign, sweetheart." a soothing yet frantic voice instructs.

"Sup." I waved my hand, not opening my eyes.

"Can I go in the ambulance with her?" Dan begged.

"Yes, you can, sir. Are you the specimen's spouse?" I chuckled, opening my eyes to see Dan's reaction.

"Boyfriend." he blushed.

"My apologies."

"None needed."

I closed my eyes again.

"Right. Stretcher?" I heard a snap and a click with jolted nervousness, startling me. Dan picked me up bridal style, earning to more hands to grip my body as I'm strapped onto the cot.

"Don't leave me."

"Never."


	2. Chapter 2

I hold my hand out as I'm lifted into the emergency mobile and Dan takes it as the engine groans to life. The stick a single needle in me and I allow myself to let out a whimper.

"It's okay, sweetheart," he murmurs into my blood stained hand before kissing it.

"Just stay with us, hun. Keep breathing when I put this on you." the feminine paramedic's voice instructs me, as my eyes are still closed. She gently snaps an elastic strap behind my head -that she'd slightly lifted- and a plastic perimeter cups over my nose and mouth like a dog muzzle. I did as I was told and breathe heavily, enjoying the sweet, cold oxygen tangle with the smoke-polluted air in my lungs.

"Dan," I whimper. A tall shadow removes itself to make room for Dan. I feel him get so close, I can feel his hot, panicky breath twisted with tears sweep across my face like a storm's wind.

"Yes, love?"

"I want to do this. I want to live but only for you..." I opened my eyes temporarily, wincing at the light gleaming in the ambulance. "Never leave me."

"Never." he squeezed my hand in reassurance. "Ya know, I'd kiss you now, DarthVader, but you'd probably taste like that metallic smell of antiseptics and plastic." I giggled wheezily at his cheeky humor but ended up coughing.

"My poor baby," Dan whispered, brushing hair out of my face.

"Alright, love birds, we're here," the muscular announces professionally and confidently.

The unseen paramedics jiggle my stretcher put of the vehicle, and I feel air rush over me continuously and Dan's hand is pulled from mine. I'm being pushed fast.

"Wait for me," I choked.

"Always." He calls, getting noticeably distant.

I let out another whimper as I began to cry again. I hear bangs of doors being shoved open and the squeaks of the wheels under me for a good full minute as I'm being pushed into my designated ward.

"It'll be okay, sweetie. Hang in there, love," the womanly voice coos, still frantic. "Just keep breathing." She instructed as I felt more needle-tipped pinches on my metal-slitted wrist.

I hear more people march into the room as bright lights shine through my eyelids and a deceitful numbness rushed over my body. Im blacking out an falling into a deep, warm sleep.


	3. Chapter 3

Bright lights shine through the cracks of my eyelids as I began to open my eyes.

What happened?

I open my eyes completely, blinking furiously in attempt to adjust to the light. A stuffy, lodging discomfort sits inside my wrists. I feel a fatiguing tightness around my nose and mouth like when you take a ring off after a long time but you still feel it there. I feel weak and ache everywhere. Im so confused, all I can do is cry. Silently, of course.

I try to silence every whimper but it didn't seem to work as I heard a chair creak but I didn't stop crying.

"Oh you're awake. Omigod I thought I lost you."

Those words echoed in my head as memories flashed before my eyes. The blades, the blood, all thirty pills, the tears, the kiss...Dan. My best friend since year eight.

"Dan?"

"Yes?"

"Everything hurts." I sniffed, sucking up every tear.

"Ill be sure to get the doctor."

"Thank you."

"Do you- remember...an-anything from... last week?..."

"It's been a week?!" I croaked.

"Yes. Do y-you rememb-ber though?"

"Yeah..." I blushed. "But Im not sure if I remember all of it."

"Well then," he smirked," allow me to rejog your memory a bit." Dan leaned down and kissed me passionately. He rested his hands on my waist ever so carefully. His lips melted onto mine and his tongue slid across my bottom lip. I opened my mouth the lightest and Dan slid his tongue between our lips with ease. We fought for dominance though he strangled my tongue easily. I let out a sigh of defeat, still capturing every inch of his lips possible as he gradually explored my mouth.

I heard the heart rate monitor pulse faster but slow down as I pulled away from the kiss, gasping. Dan grinned and kissed my forehead before dragging a lazy finger under my bottom lip, catching our concoction of saliva.

"I'll go get the doctor," he breathed.


	4. Chapter 4

I blushed a red so bright, I was practically a human BeatleJuice.

I heard the door close and I let out a flustered sigh. "He's so perfect." I ran voices and images through my mind, catching every possible memory.

"Boyfriend." His voice echoed in my mind. I was grinning from ear to ear, surely blushing; though i was still confused as to why he said that.

I picked up enough courage to move my body back and sit up. I groaned. My head pounded and my back hurt like a bitch. Surely a twenty two year old would be used to period cramps but this was bullshit to think I could hurt this badly. I looked at my wrists suddenly enlightened with my self consciousness of my scars. They were wrapped in blue thick gauze like a cast. My wrist and inner-elbows had tubes poking out of them. I felt a tightness in the back of my head and reached up slowly and brushed my fingers over the sensed area on my scalp. Stitches. I probably fell...

"Hey!" a soothing voice said. "Look who I brought." Dan shifts from the open-yet hidden- door frame to expose a man popping his head in the doorway. He was light skinned and rather short with a stubbling grey beard, a slight balding and had tiny spectacles like John Lennon.

"Ah, Samantha! Glad too see you awake. How are you feeling?" he stepped in completely, closing the door behind him. He was wearing dull baby blue scrubs that showed off a socially acceptable amount of white curly chest hair.

I hesitated to speak. Dan noticed and shuffled to the side of my bed, retrieving my hand for support and gave it a light squeeze.

"Everything hurts." I said quietly.

"Ill be sure to note that for your medication. You suffered extreme trauma in the fall you took, along with the extensive and unnecessary amount of painkillers you took," he sat, leaning forward and giving me a serious look. Like pity. "From investigation in your home and the parallel incisions on your forearms, we found several box-cutting replacement blades along with loose sharpener blades and switch blades,we conclude to ask you, was this an attempt of suicide, along with selfharm?"

"Yes." I croaked on the verge of tears. Dan squeezed my hand and rubbed the back with his thumb.

"In such a case, Miss Kingston, we have prepared therapy for your recorded depression. Your weight is under, even for your height. Does this depression have anything to do with your diet?"

"No sir, it's just my sleeping schedule."

"Right. Well, Miss Kingston-"

"Please call me Tammy."

"...Tammy... It seems all of your tests have taken a healthy enough improvement throughout the last week of your rest. You're almost completely down detoxicating of the drugs you took. You may experience nausea, headaches, cramps in the abdomen, hamstrings, and lower back, along with general fatigue. All of these symptoms should be leaving within the next two weeks. Along with therapy, you will need a supervisor; according to your social records, your occupation takes place at home. We have informed your article website company of your incident and they have compromised to your healing time."

"Thank you."

"Of course, Tammy. And so, with the job-home availability, Mr. Howell, here, has volunteered as your supervisor. Is this man your spouse?"

"Boyfriend." I mimicked.

"Ahh."

"Close enough."

"Well, then, we have ordered supervising guidelines, considering your depression, health, an relationship."

"Shoot."

"Your heart is still very weak from the detoxicating surgery preformed on your lungs and heart. Because of this, you shouldn't participate in extremely active events such as: running, jumping, tickling... And this also includes intercourse, Mr. Howell." The doctor cocked an eyebrow at Dan and Dan turned bright pink.

"Of course," I spoke up."

"Rest for a while longer, I'll have Mr. Howell sign your release forms. You should be able to leave my four pm today."

"Whats the time, now?"

"Noon."

"Thanks."

"No problem." And the doctor shut the door behind him.

"Boyfriend,huh?" I joked.

He giggled. "It was the only way they let me in."

"Oh..." I sounded a little more disappointed than I wish I had.

"But Im sure we can... work something out..." he gave me a quick but full kiss.

"Oh, Dan. Must I ask the question myself?"

He rolled his eyes in amusement. "Tammy Kingston, will you be my girlfriend?"

"Pff, obviously." I chuckled and kissed him.

**the end **


End file.
